


and remember every word that you would speak

by Pompomchan



Category: 19天 - Old先 | 19 Days - Old Xian
Genre: Angst, Fluff, M/M, Pining, Unsaid words, baby is in love, possibly ace zhan because well
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-23
Updated: 2020-04-23
Packaged: 2021-03-01 16:36:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 254
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23810161
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pompomchan/pseuds/Pompomchan
Summary: one day, zhan zhengxi wants to be able to say everything he has kept locked inside him. but that day is not today.
Relationships: Jian Yi/Zhan Zhengxi (19 Days)
Comments: 8
Kudos: 44





	and remember every word that you would speak

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this thing on a whim after reading Ch. 321 specially because I've not had the best Corona time and I was honestly craving some zhanyi content in canon. So when I saw Zhan smile softly in the last page, I kinda lost it? My dear friend V will probably be very proud because I finally wrote 19 days after debating for ages.  
>   
> Also personal head canon that Zhan still hasn't cleared anything with Yi mostly because I think he might be asexual (and not homophobic or anything) which is why he has been silent on the whole thing and c'mon he is a 16 year old dude, doesn't mean he has to have everything sorted.  
>   
> Anywho, I'm trying to be spontaneous because I don't write much these days. There are too many WIPs I've got to sort out.  
>   
> In the mean time, please read and leave kudos/comments. I'd love them. This is my first work in 19D but I hope it won't be the last.  
>   
>   
> P.S. : Wrote this while listening to _[“Be As One”](https://open.spotify.com/track/6bMEJFQQ042ESPWSoeVGLa?si=w2OEnSNQQ6qYdzSvUVjOfg)_ from Fairy Tail and the title is taken from the English translation of it that I found on [DeviantArt](https://www.deviantart.com/blackrosedeath129/art/Be-As-One-English-Lyrics-618258075).

there are words stuck in his chest.  
  
zhan thinks about them everyday.  
  
when he wakes up and sees a smiley emoji on his LINE from jian yi,  
  
_thank you for being my best friend_   
  
when he is in school and yi clings to him during recess,  
  
_i'm glad you're here with me_   
  
when they leave for home and yi doesn't want to let go of him and he clings harder and zhan knows it's because there is no one waiting for him at home,  
  
_you are not alone, i'm here_   
  
when he gets back home and there's another regular text waiting for him,  
  


> have you reached safely?

and zhan types ,

> yeah, ~~are you okay?~~

when he is in the shower, the water is cascading down his back and the heat only reminds him of yi with his face buried in the crook of his neck,

"i love you so much i could die"

_i could die for you too_

_i wish i knew how to love you the way you do me_

even now, as they head home and yi is clearly jealous because his sister gets to be closer to him, and he fights for his spot,

_it's okay , i haven't forgotten about you_

even as yi makes room for himself successfully, joking about how ziqian should walk alone, zhan wants to say,

_you idiot, you have your own place_

and zhan thinks about his heart, and smiles.

_i want to love you too._

_just let me gather my words._

* * * E N D * * *


End file.
